12 Secrets Real Moms Know

12 Simple Secrets Real Moms Know:  Getting Back to Basics and Raising Happy Kids by Michele Borba, Ed.D.

I just finished reading this book today, and I think it is definitely a book worth sharing here.

The author begins the book by discussing what some of the problems are facing today's mothers.....

"Many moms today are suffering from what can only be described as a kind of frenzy -- an abnormally high level of busyness, tension, stress, speediness, anxiety, heightened awareness, and even panic.  Many moms can't get enough sleep; they can never keep up or do enough for their kids and are feeling guilty and inadequate about it.  They're overwhelmed trying to be Supermom, to fulfill the expectations placed on them.  They overcompensate by taking on more and more until you might as well admit that they're in a state of Motherhood Mania.....And is Motherhood Mania worth it?  Is it worth all the time and energy and money we're spending?  Do our kids really benefit from all these splendid extracurricular activities and stimulating experiences?"

According to author, Michele Borba, the answer is a resounding "No"....."All our obsessive and hyper mothering is not helping our kids become happy and mature young adults and may in fact be doing them more harm than good."

So, you may be wondering, what are the 12 simple secrets?

Although there is a good chance the 12 secrets may be nothing new to many parents, Michele Borba points out that many mothers today have forgotten these simple truths about parenting.  She urges all mothers to get back to what really matters and gives practical advice, activities, tips, and further reading suggestions to help you do it.

"12 Simple Secrets Real Moms Know"

1. A mother who loves teaches worth.
2. A mother who is firm and fair gives her children a moral code to live by
3. A mother who listens shows her children they matter.
4. A mother who is a good role model gives her children an example worth copying.
5. A mother who teaches values inspires character.
6. A mother who supports her children's strengths builds their confidence.
7. A mother who encourages independence cultivates self-reliance.
8. A mother who applauds effort nurtures perseverance.
9. A mother who accepts her children's shortcomings nurtures resilience.
10. A mother who takes time for her children helps them build strong relationships.
11. A mother who laughs teaches joy.
12. A mother who takes care of herself holds together her happy family.

 As a mother, I find that I am continually a "work in progress."  I find it helpful to have a list like this I can refer to when things get tough.  Most of all, it helps me to stay focused on what is REALLY important.

My List of Children's Books About Quilts & Quilting Part 2

This is a follow-up to my previous post where I began my list of favorite picture books for children about quilts.

So, onward with the remainder of the list....

I discovered The Secret to Freedom by Marcia Vaughan at our library.  The story is set in the years before the Civil War and tells the story of Lucy, a young slave on a southern plantation, and her older brother.  Lucy learns the "secret to freedom" when her brother brings home a sack full of old quilts.  He explains to her what all the different patterns mean for slaves trying to reach freedom by means of the Underground Railroad.  Lucy decides to help by hanging out the "right" quilts at the right time for the runaways that depend on the messages.
One thing I really liked about this book was the Author's Note at the end.  In it, the author explains the quilt code further and describes the most important patterns used in the Underground Railroad.

Dolly Parton's Coat of Many Colors isn't really about quilts, but it is a sweet story about a little girl whose mother sews her a coat made of fabric scraps (much like a quilt).  When the children at school laugh at her coat, she tells them how her mother stitched the coat with love and that it is worth more than gold.  "And though we had no money I was rich as I could be in my coat of many colors that mama made for me."

Eight Hands Round:  A Patchwork Alphabet by Ann Whitford Paul is a really unique alphabet book that teaches children the names of twenty-six different quilt block patterns.  It is a "creative look at a meaningful folk art tradition."

The Quilt-Block History of Pioneer Days by Mary Cobb is another of my favorites.  I'm just going to quote from the back cover on this one.  "In this book you can find out what dozens of quilt-block designs -- from a simple nine-patch block to Martha Washington's star -- tell about America's early days.  Easy papercraft projects will let you make your own quilt blocks without sewing a single stitch."  

This book would be especially useful in an upper-elementary classroom where students are learning about pioneer days.  It's a great way to incorporate art as well as mathematics with social studies.

 I stumbled upon The Log Cabin Quilt by Ellen Howard at a second-hand store and knew it would be a fine addition to our collection.  It tells the story of a pioneer family that sets out for the woods of Michigan from Carolina.  The mother has recently passed away and the grandmother refuses to leave behind her flour sack of fabric scraps.  The three children, along with their father and grandmother, try to make their new log cabin feel like home but to no avail -- until one cold and bitter evening when the children find a unique use for the fabric scraps.

My final book is Sewing Quilts by Ann Turner, which "captures the importance of quilting and the simple joys and fears of a little girl growing up in the early twentieth century."  The little girl watches her mama sew a log-cabin quilt, and she knows that, somehow, the quilt will keep her family safe from harm.




So, that completes my list.  I'm sure that as time goes on, we will acquire more books similar to these.  I'll just have to add a part 3 if that should happen!  I hope you have time to check out some of these books from your local library and possibly even add them to your own collection some day!


Happy reading!  Happy quilting!

My List of Children's Books about Quilts & Quilting (Part 1)

I've realized that I have a "thing" for children's books that feature quilts and/or quilting.  I seem to have amassed a small collection of these types of books -- most of them purchased before I even had children!  I guess I used the excuse of being a teacher to make some of these purchases, since you can never have enough books in your classroom.

Anyway, I thought it might be a nice idea to compile a list of the titles we own and then add to it as I discover more titles along these lines.  So, here goes....

I absolutely MUST begin this list with The Patchwork Quilt by Valerie Fluornoy, for this is the book that really started it all for me.  It was after viewing an episode of the PBS show "Reading Rainbow," featuring this book, that I became interested in making quilts.  The rest, as they say, is history.

The Patchwork Quilt is a beautiful story about a little girl who loves listening to her grandmother as she pieces a patchwork quilt made of fabric scraps from every member of their family.  The little girl learns how to sew the patches onto the quilt too, and when her grandmother becomes too ill to work on the quilt, the little girl and her mother finish it.  It is a wonderful story, not just about quilting, but about the love within a family.  As well as being featured on "Reading Rainbow," this book was a winner of the Coretta Scott King Award.

Patricia Polacco's The Keeping Quilt is the next book in our collection.  As with most of her work, this is a story rich in family tradition and accompanied by Polacco's signature artwork.  It is the story of a quilt made by Patricia's great-great-grandmother and passed down through her family for almost a century.  

Throughout the story, one generation after another uses the quilt to mark special events in their lives.  The quilt is used as a Sabbath tablecloth, a wedding canopy, and a blanket to welcome each new baby into the family.  Patricia Polacco's The Keeping Quilt is "a heartwarming story of one family's special symbol of enduring love and faith."

The Quiltmaker's Gift by Jeff Brumbeau is a "charming fable for our times that celebrates the joy of giving."  It is the story of a generous quilter who gives away all of her quilts to the poor and needy.  An angry and greedy king decides that HE would like one of her quilts, but the quiltmaker will only agree under one condition -- he must give away all of his worldly possessions.  He must, himself, become poor before she will make a quilt for him.  After many attempts to change her mind, the king finally relents and begins to give away his beloved things.  With each gift he gives, he becomes more and more happy.  Finally, when he has nothing left to give away, the quiltmaker presents him with his quilt.

The artwork in this book (done by Gail de Marcken) is incredibly detailed, stunning, and a visual inspiration!

The Quilt Story by Tony Johnson with illustrations by Tomie dePaola is the next book in our collection.  This is a cute story about two little girls -- one from pioneer days and the other from modern times, who share the same quilt.  

The story begins with a pioneer mother sewing a quilt for her young daughter.  The girl's name, Abigail, is sewn into the quilt.  The little girl loves the quilt and it is a great comfort to her during times of sickness and especially after a move across the prairie.  After a time, the quilt becomes forgotten until it is found again, mouse-eaten and torn, in an attic by another little girl -- presumably a distant relative of the first little girl.  She takes the quilt to her mother who mends the quilt for her.  Just like the girl from pioneer days, the modern girl has to move to a new place.  The quilt brings her a sense of comfort during a time when she feels sad and helps her adjust to her new home.  

This book has a lot less text than the previous three books I have shared, so is a good choice for reading to younger children who may not be able to sit and listen for a longer story.

My final book for this blog post is Sweet Clara and the Freedom Quilt by Deborah Hopkinson with paintings by James Ransome.  Another featured "Reading Rainbow" title, this book is about a 12-year-old slave girl who wants desperately to reunite with her mother and find her way to freedom.  With the help of her "aunt" she goes from working in the fields to working in the Big House as a seamstress.  

Working in the Big House allows Clara opportunities to overhear discussions about the Underground Railroad.  She soon gets the idea to begin stitching a map to freedom in a quilt which is made of scraps she salvages from her work in the Big House.  Eventually, Clara makes her way to her mother and to freedom.  However, the quilt is left behind with her "aunt" in the slave quarters on the plantation and used by many others who have heard of the quilt and its map to freedom.

Well, we have more titles, but they'll have to wait for another day....

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Click here for my follow-up blog post Part 2.

"What the?"

An interesting thing happened yesterday afternoon.  My husband and I took our kids to a nature preserve so they could exercise their new-found bike riding skills in a fairly level and traffic-free environment.  We typically have them ride around a paved loop in the preserve. 

Anyways, as we came full circle and were heading out of the preserve back to the parking lot, I noticed a book lying on the bench that was definitely not there when we had passed by on the way in.

Well, this interested me immediately, so I picked it up.  I mean, I couldn't just leave it there to get ruined in the elements, could I?  Especially after reading this:

So, I'm doing what it says.  I started reading the book last night and registered the book on the book crossing web site this morning.  The title of the book is Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer.  It turns out I am the second person to read this particular copy of the book.  I can't wait to see where it ends up once I "release" it back into the wild!

Now, tell me -- Would this kind of thing happen with a Kindle or a Nook?  I don't think so.  No matter what technological advances come along, I hope to never see a day when "real" books become obsolete.

Beginning The Love Dare

So, I started reading this book the other day called The Love Dare by Stephen & Alex Kendrick.  Here is the synopsis from the back cover:

"The Love Dare is a 40-day challenge for husbands and wives to understand and practice unconditional love.  Whether your marriage is hanging by a thread or healthy and strong, The Love Dare is a journey you need to take.  It's time to learn the keys to finding true intimacy and developing a dynamic marriage.  Take the dare!"

The book was published in 2008, but I first learned about it earlier this year while watching the movie "Fireproof" when it was broadcast on the Lifetime channel.  I don't typically watch movies on that channel, but I had heard of the movie (from the TLC show "19 Kids & Counting") and recognized it as I was channel surfing one evening.  It was about half-way through when I came across it, and I have still never actually seen the entire movie.  I did, however, see enough to peek my interest in the book featured in the movie.  I really wanted to know what was in that book!

So, I went online to our town library's web site to see if I couldn't get my hands on a copy.  No luck.  I tried the next closest library in another town.  No luck again.  Next I went to my favorite site for obtaining free books -- Paperback Swap!  It wasn't available, but I put the title on my "wish list" and waited.  That was several months ago.  Last week, I received a notification that the book was on its way to me!

On Tuesday evening I began reading the book.  It is now Saturday, and I have still not gotten past Day 1 (page 5).  I decided that I am going to try and do what the book says and not read ahead.  It has been three days and I still do not feel that I have completed Day 1's assignment.  I decided that for each day, I will not move on to the next Day until I feel I have satisfactorily completed the previous Day's assignment.  Unfortunately, at the rate I'm going, it's going to take about 160 days to get through this book!

Curious about Day 1's assignment?  I'm going to share it here, but I should also say that for this particular dare, I decided not only to do it with my husband but my children as well.  Since I spend ALL day, every day with my children, that's probably why it's taking me a while to get this one checked off my list.

"For the next day, resolve to demonstrate patience and to say nothing negative to your spouse at all.  If the temptation arises, choose not to say anything.  It's better to hold your tongue than to say something you'll regret."

So, in other words, I must be patient and hold my words in.  That is no easy task for me!  Hence, why I'm still working on it four days later....